Just want to say, God, how thankful I am this morning that you answer my prayers. I spent much of my twenties living with daily migraines, depression, and anxiety so severe I seldom left the house. And I prayed that some day you’d let me be productive by having children and a career.
And you gave me four beautiful children. I was able to stay home much of the time with them as they grew. And despite all of my many failures and flaws, you were with me as I asked for your grace and mercy in our lives. You were with me when I worshipped you through my tears as you touched my heart with your goodness all around me despite tragedies that touched us all.
Today, I look back on the content of those prayers: many were praising you for who you are. But others were asking for specific things… that you would let me lead worship someday and that you’d let me write for a living someday.
From my early twenties on I cried through one praise song after another just feeling your presence all around me. And then in 2019, you led me to a position leading worship at renewalgac.org. You sent me to this church. I have no doubt. And every week I ask you to be with me as I undertake an honor that is too magnificent to put into words. I don’t deserve to be up there leading worship, but you use me despite my human flaws and failures. And you send encouragers to lift me up every time I feel discouraged.
And then in July of 2020. you sent Charlie, a friend from high school to call me up out of the blue and offer me a job writing and marketing at whooshagency.com. I have been at this job over a year now and loving every minute. Today I realized that I have written an average of 62,000 published words per week since Feb 2021. And I am in wonder that you brought me to this place, that you answered this prayer!
I never logically thought through how to reach these goals. I just worshiped and praised YOU God. You do more than I could ever ask or imagine. You fight my battles for me. I just give my worries and anxieties to You. You take them all off my shoulders and give me your peace. Your way of giving peace is beyond my human understanding. How do you take all of my pain and turn it into hope and goodness? It’s like the song we sang Sunday: “You turn graves into gardens. You turn seas into highways. You turn shame into glory. You’re the only one who can.” You’re the only one who can do this!
I simply lay all of my struggles, failures, joys, victories, anxieties, and hopes before You as I worship You, knowing that You make a way. You work it out for my good. You work it out so that I will praise Your NAME and everyone will know that You are good to those who trust in YOU! And my gratefulness overflows this morning as I worship and praise You.
Thank you for making my life so full of Your goodness and victory. I pray that you continue to help me see the diamonds glittering in ashes and the gold strands amid the dark blackness of the pain in the world.
Thank you Jesus for the cross and the beautiful light of your forgiveness for all of the wrongs in my life. You make my wrongs into a beautiful clean slate everyday. Your mercies are new every morning when I wake up. You gave your all so that I could have this clean conscience despite my failures. It’s you who makes me clean and new each day.
You do it for everyone who asks. Thank you Jesus.